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59 Thoughts everyone has had during their first drive

59 Thoughts Everyone Has Had During Their First Driving Experience

  1. At last. Me and this magnificent beast called car. It is mine, and I shall tame you, car. Freedom is mine!!!
  2. Just kidding, we haven’t even left the parking lot yet.
  3. BUT STILL. The day has finally come: I’m about to drive, watch out world!
  4. Have cars always been this huge? Seriously, how am I supposed to maneuver this thing around, much less parallel park it?
  5. Okay. First thing: Put the key into ignition. Hot and fresh out the kitchen, mama rolling that body got every man in here wishin–
  6. No! Focus. Focus! The Rock focus
  7. My dad is saying my name over and over again. I think he’s kinda freaking out.
  8. Don’t worry, dad, I’ve got this. You just sit back and relax.
  9. Wait, what do I do again?
  10. Oh, yeah. Turn the car on. Duhhhh.
  11. Just gonna lightly turn the key…
  12. Oh god, the car is on. THE CAR IS ON, PEOPLE.
  13. It’s okay. I’m okay. I’m breathing. I’m good.
  14. Now what? Oh yeah, buckle the seat belt. Duh.
  15. This thing is supposed to save my life?
  16. Now dad’s telling me to put the car in Reverse. I got this.
  17. Nooooope, that’s Drive. Sorry guys, I meant to do that. Be cool.
  18. Nooooope, parking brake is still on.
  19. Aaaaand we’re moving. Backwards.
  20. Wait oh my god we’re moving backwards. And my foot isn’t even on the pedal. HOW DOES THIS WORK.
  21. Seriously, am I driving the car, or is the car driving me?
  22. HARD BRAKE, HARD BRAKE.
  23. We’re good. Breathe, people. Mostly me. I need to breathe.
  24. Okay, now let’s try putting the car in Drive. Just gonna shift this thing up…
  25. Aaaaand we’re moving forward. It’s happening!
  26. Now dad’s telling me to speed up a little. Guess I’ll just press down on the peda–Man driving and freaking out
  27. NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE
  28. HARD BRAKE. HARD. BRAKE.
  29. Am I alive? Am I good? Holy crap that was scary.
  30. Okay let’s try again. Just gonna GENTLY–
  31. Oh my god the car is moving. I’m moving the car. I’m driving! I AM LEGEND.
  32. I’M DRIVING!!!! IT’S HAPPENING, IT’S ALL HAPPENING.People very excited to drive
  33. I AM A FREAKING MASTER! I AM AN ADULT DRIVER! I AM CONQUERING THE WORLD. SLAY, ME!
  34. Turning left. Turning right. Blinkers on, ain’t no thang. Like a freaking master and commander of this fine ship, out here on these salty seas.
  35. I’m a freaking sultan of the land, the warrior of the wasteland, the ayatollah of rock and rolla!!!!!
  36. Basically, I am Vin Diesel in every movie rn.Vin Diesel has a lot of time
  37. So…dad says I’m ready to try driving on an actual street.
  38. I guess we’re doing this. Okay, self. Let’s do this.
  39. Aaaaaand turning. Onto the street. Here we go.
  40. Empty street. NBD. I’ll just go suuuuuper slow.
  41. I’m going. I’m on the street. I’m driving on the actual street. It’s real! LOOK AT ME, WORLD. LOOK UPON ME.
  42. Wait, am I inside the lines? How can I tell if I’m inside the lines? This car feels huge.
  43. “Try changing lanes.” Lol, okay dad.
  44. How do I change lanes again? Oh yeah: Check mirrors. Look in rearview. Signal. Turn head.
  45. Wait, but I thought I was supposed to keep my eyes on the road at all times…
  46. How does anyone pay attention to all of these things and drive at the same time?
  47. I’ll just casually TURN MY HEAD REAL QUICK WOW IS THAT WHIPLASH NBD GUESS I’LL BE BREAKING MY NECK EVERY TIME I CHANGE LANES WHATEVER.
  48. I’m doing it. I’m changing lanes! YES. SUCCESS, ME. I AM DRIVER.
  49. What happens if you sneeze while you’re driving? How are you supposed to keep your eyes open?
  50. Oh no, there’s another car behind me. Where did they come from?Girl hoping for no traffic
  51. They’re so close! THEY’RE TOO CLOSE. Back up, dude! Does anyone have respect for the two-second rule anymore? clueless cher driving poorly
  52. Maybe it’s me. Maybe I’m going too slow. BUT THE SPEED LIMIT IS 30!!!
  53. They hate me. They hate me sooooo much.
  54. Please just pass me. I’m just a lowly student driver, okay? I’M NOT A PART OF YOUR WORLD YET.
  55. Okay, they’re passing me. They know my shame.
  56. I’M SORRY.
  57. Aaaand back into the parking lot we go. See, now I’m starting to get the hang of it.
  58. What up, curb? Okay, so maybe this isn’t my best parking attempt.
  59. Wow, I can’t believe I just drove for the first time. I’m alive. And I didn’t crash. This driving thing…not bad. Not bad.