Thanksgiving means making conversation with those cousins you never see, eating three helpings of your aunt’s sweet potato casserole and of course, giving thanks. Something you’re not thankful for? Those unbearable car rides to the relatives’ house for Thanksgiving dinner that usually involve a missed exit, fights over the air conditioning and someone’s Happy Meal landing on the floor. These are the 22 worst parts about driving to your relatives for Thanksgiving.
1. Going a mile and a half down the road and then your brother realizing he forgot his headphones.
2. Your dad scolding him for being irresponsible and saying: “Do you realize we have to turn around just for you?!” Great start, fam.
3. Having to pull over at every rest stop in central Texas so that your mom can go pee.
4. Or being shouted at by your dad, “You can hold it!” when you say you have to go.
5. Arguing with your sibling about which fast food restaurant to stop at. Anything but Subway, Liam. Why do you like Subway so much?
6. Sitting in traffic and your mom cheerfully suggesting you sing Christmas carols. Still four weeks away, Deb.
7. Watching the battery on your phone slowly die and realizing it might mean that you have to interact with your family members.
8. Your dad telling you that you better not be using data because “we don’t have the unlimited plan.”
9. Your mom suggesting you read a book. Uh, nope.
10. Enduring your sibling repeatedly asking: “Are we there yet?” We’re obviously not since the vehicle is still in motion, Liam.
11. Enduring your sibling repeatedly asking: “Where are we?” We’re in Yeehaw Junction, Florida, Liam. Does that mean anything to you?
12. Anyone suggesting you play the license plate game.
13. Watching in horror as your sibling spills grape slushy all over the carpet of the sedan.
14. Hearing the rage in your dad’s voice as he shouts, “I told you to put a lid on it!”
15. Being crammed in the backseat between one restless sibling and a giant box of hand-me-downs for your little cousin. Did we need to bring that?
16. Being crammed in the backseat between two restless siblings.
17. Being crammed in the backseat between two restless siblings and a yappy dog who suffers from car sickness.
18. Dealing with your carsick, yappy dog that has just vomited on the floor and having to roll down the windows and endure cold gusts of wind in order to get some fresh air.
19. Your parents arguing about the temperature in the car. She likes it toasty; he needs some AC because these kids are making his blood boil.
20. Your dad missing the exit and mayhem breaking loose.
21. The GPS having trouble acquiring satellite connection and your father becoming infuriated.
22. Being exhausted once you finally get to your relatives house after that nightmare of a car ride.
Celebrating Thanksgiving with relatives is fun. Driving there to see them is not. Get your license and get your freedom from family car rides with Aceable drivers ed. You’ll be thankful you did.