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The Night Before Christmas (Aceable Edition)

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You've heard "The Night Before Christmas" many times, but have you heard the Aceable version? We took the tried-and-true tale of the man in the red suit and turned it into a story about a mischief-making robot. Listen to our take on Clement Clarke Moore's "A Visit From St. Nicholas," below.

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the office

Not a sound could be heard, not a customer had called us.

The certificates were stacked on the table with care,

In hopes that new graduates soon would have theirs.

Our students were nestled all snug in their homes

While earning their licenses right from their phones.

And back at the office, with no one to chat,

I plopped on the couch, for a short mid-work nap.

When out on the street there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the couch to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like the wind,

Peered down at the corner of 5th and Rio Grande.

The moon shining down on the black asphalt road

Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below.

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But a shiny red car with five tiny gears.

The small robot driver moved with such grace

I know in a moment it must’ve been Ace!

Known for driving classes in 27 states,

Ace churns out his courses at impossible rates!

“Now, Texas! now, Utah! now, New York and Georgia!

On, Iowa! on, Cali! on, Kansas and Florida!

To the top of the App Store, to the top of Google Play,

“The greatest course ever,” reviewers all say.

“As drivers ed courses go, this one’s the best,

Compared with the others, it’s just no contest.”

So for the top-rated app Ace was known,

the first ever drivers ed course for a phone.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard from the hall

the clinking and clanking of a robot so small

As I drew in my head, and was turning around

in the office jolly Ace came with a bound.

He was covered in metal, from his head to his toes.

And was naked — but for a Santa hat as his clothes.

A bundle of tech devices he held in his hands,

Androids, iPhones and tablets, a collection quite grand.

His eyes — how they gleamed! his smile like the sun!

His cheeks were like silver, His nose (well, he didn’t have one).

His bright yellow eyes were shaped like half moons,

You could tell a driving teacher had just walked in the room.

The shape of an A he wore right on his chest,

Showing off the logo of only the best.

He had a square face and long, lanky legs,

That shook when he laughed, like sunny side eggs.

He was polished and shiny, a right cheerful young bot.

And I smiled when saw our little mascot.

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work.

Responding to emails and filling out certs.

Then just as the clock on the wall stuck midnight

He gave me a wink and vanished from sight.

I returned to my desk, to email the team,

“I think Ace was here! Or was it a dream?”

Then I heard a small voice, fade into the night,

“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night.”

Krista Doyle